So I realize it's 11:15 at night, not the best time to start a new post but what can I say, late nights are what college students are supposed to do. Although my idea of a "late night" is midnight but I digress.What I've been thinking about lately, besides obvious school stuff which I will post about later, is the notion of "Adulthood". When I turned 18 I relished in the fact that I could now sign my own forms, buy spray paint, cold meds and could also pull the "I'm an adult so listen to me" card with my siblings, (that doesn't always work btw). Then came the big 2-0. Now, we're cooking! One year away from full "adulthood" and finally out of those teen years...(good times, good times).
So today I was feeling kinda crabby, just a mixture of stress, the weather, and good ol' hormones so I went for a drive and to swing in the park. It was cold, but the solitude at the frozen park was nice. During my nice talk with God about some stuff I was griping about, I realized some things. I have always considered myself relatively mature for my age with a fairly decent grasp on intellectual reasoning with a dash of intuition thrown in, lol. However, today I realized just how much a tend to complain, or try to rationalize my behavior to others in an attempt to make my self feel validated and "right". I was praying and asking God to "give me peaceful thoughts" about some stuff. Then it hit me, (thank you Elisabeth George, Women's Retreat, and Philippians 4:8) I needed to CHOOSE to have kind thoughts! Instead of dwelling on how to make my opinion the one to follow, I need to see what is right about this situation. I also needed to follow the direction given in Philippians 4:6, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God."
So today I attempted to put these key Biblical principles into practice. Instead of being grumpy, I chose to thank God for the beautiful sun that appeared this afternoon. Instead of being stressed with circumstances, I chose to thank God for the wonderful privilege to live such a life that my "biggest issue" is getting good grades in school. Instead of giving into my exhaustion, I chose to praise Him for His amazing sacrifice for me. When compared to the cross, my troubles don't seem so great. And you know what, the promise given after choosing to thank God is this, that "...the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." (Phil. 4:7) Which, I must say, is a pretty good deal.
So today, I didn't do any of those things that the world would call "adult-like", but the Holy Spirit did a work in my heart to further develop me into the mature follower of Christ that I long to be. You know, trading my heavy burden for His perfect peace; I'll never quite fully grasp the fairness of that trade.
